He's a Solid Bet!

Thats right, I've found the candidate for you. If at the end of the last post you thought, these candidates really do suck, then vote for him:

First of all, Desk Lamp is always positive, bringing light everywhere he's set down. And if his light goes out, just replace his bulb and he is back in the game. Second, Desk Lamp is a lamp, he can't move, so you always know where he stands on the issues.

Desk Lamp is made of composite materials mined in the US, sent to Indonesia for processing, and assembled in China before coming back to his home country for the good of us all. He has a nuanced understanding of international as well domestic politics.

Desk Lamp is also constantly using energy, but efficiently and in small amounts, making him a natural fit to tackle our national energy problems. A credential other candidates cannot claim.

Finally, Desk Lamp cares about our children. He provides the proper reading environment to satisfy curious minds, and makes visible the wonders of the natural world.

If you're looking for a candidate who is known world wide, who has the qualities we require, and who can fit comfortably in an airplane storage bin, then you know what to do...


Illuminate 2008!